The Legend of the EX

(13:40:15) ditriech: i like the fact that they’re really upset about the whole white women thing.
(13:40:24) ditriech: and thats like the best they could do.
(13:40:24) WoodnShoePimp: it’s tennessee
(13:40:26) ditriech: true
(13:40:38) ditriech: but still, that’s you’re best attack?
(13:40:53) ditriech: like like having a weak hook against jc’s headbutt.
(13:41:04) WoodnShoePimp: it’s the GOP, it’s an effective one for their constituents
(13:41:30) WoodnShoePimp: they run on racism (affirmative action, immigration, black men for white women) and homophobia
(13:41:39) ditriech: true
(13:41:55) ditriech: though i’m personally against calling them the GOP.
(13:42:18) WoodnShoePimp: Grand Old Pedophiles?
(13:42:46) WoodnShoePimp: somebody tagged that on the duke ellington bridge about 100 yards from my apartment
(13:43:03) WoodnShoePimp: i love this city, even the graffiti is political
(13:43:09) ditriech: haha
(13:43:56) WoodnShoePimp: there’s just no good abbreviation for them though
(13:44:05) WoodnShoePimp: there are libs and dems, but reps are representatives not republicans
(13:44:18) ditriech: yeah, but i refuse to call them the grand old party.
(13:44:28) ditriech: ill sacrifice the typing for that one
(13:44:56) WoodnShoePimp: 130 years ago they were the good guys
(13:45:02) WoodnShoePimp: party of lincoln and all that
(13:45:25) ditriech: yeah, but a 130 years ago twinkies didnt exist.
(13:45:56) WoodnShoePimp: neither did dildos
(13:46:08) WoodnShoePimp: huh
(13:46:13) WoodnShoePimp: dildo isn’t in gaim’s dictionary
(13:46:13) ditriech: ….not battery powered ones, no
(13:46:43) WoodnShoePimp: yes
(13:46:46) WoodnShoePimp: indeed
(13:47:26) ditriech: huh. wikipedia says that they didnt come around until the 40s
(13:47:39) WoodnShoePimp: battery powered ones?
(13:47:50) WoodnShoePimp: cause non-battery powered ones were around much longer than that
(13:48:07) WoodnShoePimp: read a restoration play at kenyon (1660s) that featured dildos very prominently
(13:48:35) ditriech: rubber dildos.
(13:49:16) WoodnShoePimp: well yes rubber ones
(13:49:23) WoodnShoePimp: they used primarily ivory, i believe
(13:49:31) ditriech:
(13:49:31) WoodnShoePimp: wood gave too many splinters
(13:50:04) ditriech: sadly, this is now in context
(13:51:01) WoodnShoePimp:
(13:52:21) ditriech: have you noticed our conversations always take a turn for the awesome?
(13:53:26) WoodnShoePimp: that’s because they’re our conversations
(13:53:36) WoodnShoePimp: by definition they move in an upwardly awesome way

For the zero people that read cofabg, the EX was probably the greatest thing I’ll ever do with my lifesd1. It reached a level of greatness that I’ll never, ever get on again. And, seeing as it’s not coming back until I, or anyone really, can come up with alternate screennames for the 68 or so people that are featured on itsd2, most people will never see what it was. So, for today, I’ve decided to share with you some of the beauty that was regularly featured on the EX.

(23:44:34) ditriech: I say you could save the girl culture for phd
(23:44:42) ditriech: or, phid, as I like to call it
(23:44:47) LookABrownGirl: phid
(23:44:51) LookABrownGirl: i likem
(23:44:54) LookABrownGirl: me like.
(23:45:31) ditriech: its like phiddy cent
(23:45:35) ditriech: only with a lot more schoolin’
(23:45:49) LookABrownGirl: ha!
(23:45:53) LookABrownGirl: A TON MORE YOU MEAN.
(23:46:25) ditriech: well, he does have a BS in Street Pharmacy
(23:46:39) ditriech: and a MBA in "jackin’ niggaz"
(23:47:53) ditriech: no?
(23:47:54) ditriech: ok

(00:55:34) ditriech: YES!
(00:55:42) ditriech: NORTONIA
(00:55:44) ditriech: FUCK YEAH!
(00:56:32) WhamBangThud: COMING AROUND TO DRINK THE MOTHERFUCKING DAY AWAY
(00:56:41) WhamBangThud: NORTONIA
(00:56:42) ditriech: im so happy
(00:57:03) ditriech: I can’t wait to tell dutch. Now I can tell you about stage 3
(00:57:10) ditriech: ..well, when I get done with it
(00:57:22) WhamBangThud: Profit?
(00:57:27) ditriech: yes
(00:57:32) ditriech: well, no but yes
(00:58:26) ditriech: …quick question. do you have any idea when the underpants gnomes episode aired?
(00:59:03) WhamBangThud: I’d guess at three years ago
(00:59:39) ditriech: remember the story arc with choo choo stealing aerie’s underwear and selling them on ebay?
(00:59:47) ditriech: you think they are related?
(01:01:00) WhamBangThud: Fucking dammit
(01:01:35) WhamBangThud: You’re like the Mel Gibson in a black winter cap of the nerd-cartoon world.
(01:01:39) WhamBangThud: Cut that shit out
(01:01:45) ditriech:
(01:01:53) ditriech: its research
(01:02:12) WhamBangThud: Is that what you told her?
(01:02:21) ditriech: she fell for it
(01:02:37) WhamBangThud: And then on it.
(01:02:46) WhamBangThud: And I’m not talking any more.

More convos after the jump


(22:28:54) MrSweetastic441: cool
(22:29:17) MrSweetastic441: this has debauchery written all over it
(22:29:27) ditriech: oh yes.
(22:32:24) MrSweetastic441: plan for the weekend = not to get arrested
(22:33:10) ditriech: its really scary when we have to set our standards this low.
(22:33:17) ditriech: luckily, mo’s staying in dc.
(22:33:26) MrSweetastic441: true
(22:33:41) ditriech: or it would be plan for the weekend= stay out of maximum security.
(22:34:46) MrSweetastic441: i don’t think cleveland is ready for that group of four
(22:34:57) MrSweetastic441: not even the robert paulson is ready for that
(22:35:15) ditriech: nope. well, vegas might be.
(22:36:39) MrSweetastic441: but everything that happens in vegas stays in vegas and one of us would inevitably end up in a hole out in the desert

(22:13:17) SXEDProf: watch out, adam — it’s a stingray!
(22:13:25) ditriech: thats just horrible and wrong
(22:13:27) SXEDProf: it will pierce you in the heart
(22:13:32) ditriech: yet hilarious at the same time
(22:13:40) ditriech: what will we do with you?
(22:13:42) SXEDProf: can you even think of a more perfect way for steve irwin to go?
(22:14:03) SXEDProf: a ridiculous, animal-related end to a ridiculous, animal-related life
(22:14:11) ditriech: by that one crocodile in Hook.
(22:14:19) ditriech: that would be more awesome
(22:14:19) SXEDProf: ok, that would be good
(22:14:27) ditriech: BANGARANG PETER!

(11:51:47) SouljaRoyTellEm: a-bear =)
(11:51:53) ditriech: que es bueno?
(11:51:59) SouljaRoyTellEm: i had sex on saturday night
(11:52:01) SouljaRoyTellEm: WITH A GIRL!
(11:52:04) SouljaRoyTellEm: and injured my knee
(11:52:21) SouljaRoyTellEm: it was a skinny couch and she jumped on top and hyper extended my knee
(11:52:30) SouljaRoyTellEm: at the time i couldnt say "hold on, i have to stretch"
(11:52:34) ditriech: haha
(11:52:44) SouljaRoyTellEm: or make the peter griffin "ssss. ahhhhh…. ssss. ahhhh" noise
(11:53:04) ditriech: haha
(11:53:15) SouljaRoyTellEm: you tell me though
(11:53:18) SouljaRoyTellEm: was the best part that
(11:53:29) SouljaRoyTellEm: or that she had the radio on and right around when i nutted "laffy taffy" was on

WhamBangThud: Apparently it’s a montage of all the great unwritten comings-out of the Civil War.
WhamBangThud: At some point it simply degenerates into porn.
WhamBangThud: "Longstreet"
ditriech: i guess the south will rise again, neh?
WhamBangThud: And again
WhamBangThud: And again
WhamBangThud: The Japanese set influence can be seen in the unfortunate 21-gun salute number.
ditriech: god i need internet again
WhamBangThud: And the phrase "we are facing dismounted cavalry" takes on new unheard of meanings
WhamBangThud: An assistant director and three gaffers were tragically lost when the PA misunderstood things along the line of "money shot" and "grapeshot."
WhamBangThud: Hollywood police remarked "It’s just like what happened to Jason Lee, but with porn and wagon tacks through the skull of a guy carrying donuts."
ditriech: (note to self: if ever want to update ex, click on im WhamBangThud)
WhamBangThud: (Note to self: if still don’t have job in 2 weeks, demand per-word compensation from Adam)
ditriech: you get paid as soon as i do skippy

(21:25:52) ditriech: i dont like any of the people here
(21:25:58) ditriech: they strike me as stupid
(21:26:30) tdrdn1888: well I could have told you that
(21:27:00) ditriech: yes, you could have
(21:27:31) tdrdn1888: if only you had asked
(21:27:40) ditriech: i know, i should have
(21:27:42) ditriech: im sorry
(21:28:19) tdrdn1888: i mean, I remember this one short guy on my hall, he was so weird…slept a lot and he was……..
(21:28:23) tdrdn1888: black!!!!!!!!
(21:28:42) ditriech: my word
(21:29:12) tdrdn1888: i nearly fainted when I heard there was someone like that there
(21:29:16) tdrdn1888: nearly
(21:29:23) tdrdn1888: not quite
(21:29:27) tdrdn1888: but nearly
(21:29:34) ditriech: i would have felt the same way friend
(21:29:37) ditriech: the exact same way

(23:33:46) ditriech: im productively working on my liver
(23:33:49) LookABrownGirl: haha
(23:33:53) LookABrownGirl: thats counterproductive
(23:36:58) LookABrownGirl: poor liver
(23:36:59) LookABrownGirl: (waves)
(23:38:02) ditriech: ("save me" says the liver)
(23:38:19) ditriech: ("TAKE THIS BEER!" Adam pounds beer)
(23:38:24) ditriech: (liver cries)
(23:38:48) LookABrownGirl: i bet it has nightmares about beer
(23:38:52) LookABrownGirl: endless fountains of beer
(23:39:08) ditriech: beer lots of beer lots of beer yeah
(23:39:21) LookABrownGirl: is that song to the tune of magical trevor?
(23:39:24) LookABrownGirl: cuz thats how i hear it
(23:39:29) LookABrownGirl: everyone loves, alcoholic adam

WhamBangThud: Can of jelly. Dead in an instant. Disgruntled clerk. Brain sample tastes like strawberry.
PcktBread: cadaver juice!
WhamBangThud: … blender …
PcktBread: excellent
WhamBangThud: Blender? I didn’t even know her!
WhamBangThud: New mission in life.
WhamBangThud: Stand next to a blender.
WhamBangThud: Sexily.
WhamBangThud: Seduce someone with combination whirring noises and suggestive eyebrow movements.
PcktBread: Like at Walmart or something?
WhamBangThud: Great idea.
PcktBread: you could go thru the whole appliance section
WhamBangThud: Mother comes by to look at washer. Opens top. Me. Spinning around. "Heyyyy baby."
PcktBread: how you doin’
WhamBangThud: "do you like the way I spin?"
WhamBangThud: You’re gettin me all agitated …
PcktBread: gives a whole new meaning to the whole "dirty" thing
WhamBangThud: ~presses handle back down. Slowly.~
PcktBread: lol
PcktBread: haha, the commercial that just came on said "There’s a line we all cross in our lives…"
WhamBangThud: There has got to be a way to work a bagel into this …
PcktBread: I think we end up at that line way too frequently
PcktBread: mmmmmm, bagel
WhamBangThud: Exactly the response I’m looking for.

(10:48:54) WoodnShoePimp: i would change my facebook picture now but it would jeopardize my membership in cold weather animals
(10:48:59) ditriech: yup
(10:49:08) WoodnShoePimp: although
(10:49:11) WoodnShoePimp: it would have griz in it
(10:49:14) WoodnShoePimp: and he’s a cold weather animal
(10:49:22) ditriech: ah
(10:49:24) ditriech: great point
(10:49:59) WoodnShoePimp: thank you
(10:50:07) WoodnShoePimp: i think i might ride the panda for a couple more days though
(10:50:09) WoodnShoePimp: ..
(10:50:11) WoodnShoePimp: you know, figuratively speaking
(10:50:16) ditriech: haha
(10:51:29) ditriech: "how does it feel to be the first person in the profile in over a year Dutch?"
(10:52:00) WoodnShoePimp: holy shit
(10:52:02) WoodnShoePimp: seriously?
(10:52:06) WoodnShoePimp: i need to call my parents
(10:52:11) WoodnShoePimp: 😀
(10:52:39) WoodnShoePimp: "hey mom and dad! i just made it in adam’s AIM profile!"

"er… that’s nice dear"

sd1: Not really. I hope.

sd2: And when it does come back, I probably won’t update it anymore, because I only talk to like 5 people online now, and if anything the EX needs variety

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