This exists, and I’ve been told it’s a musical.
July 31? Snowden?
UPDATE: Just saw it, with friends. Quotes from viewing will take the place of an actual review
"This whole movie is killing, smoking, fucking and monkeys
I think you just wrote the dust jacket."
"[nipple becomes erect]
Watch out! She’s going to charge!"
"Whose ass is that?
We don’t know, but we know there’s an ass.
"Every vampire owns one fog machine and one swimming pool. It’s the law."
"Boy or girl?
"Your mouth tastes like aftershave and old wood!"
"The room just now smells like old people.
Bam! Outta nowhere!
Disenfectant and diapers!"
"Every scene of this needs a quiz. Is there a monkey? Check yes or no."
"Ow my shin! Ow my other shin! Why don’t you have light bulbs! Why do you own so many ottomans!"
"[on screen a monkey melts]
Sarandon: We need more funding! This research shows promise!
Viewer: We could melt rabbits!"
"What’s up with the soundtrack?
Are they fucking? Is that sex noise?
Is the monkey in the corner making fart sounds with his hands?
A check for this scene!"
"They stopped cutting to stuff.
Did it end?
What happened at the end?
Yeah, dial it back.
What happened at the beginning?
We still had beer at the beginning.
… so true."